urghh...chicken pox ( survive the battle)

Hello guys... it's been a while since my last entry. Sad but true, i'm having my chicken pox right now and i've been 'dealing' with it since last week. Thank god i managed to 'stand still' till the last day of the power plant simulator training. In this post i would like to show my gratitude to my beloved housemates for being super-duper nice to me all the way through the battle. huhuhu.. i cant really think what would happen to me without those helping hands.. I would like to say a lot of thanks to my beloved housemate Kak Pipa for driving me to the hospital.. yes...she drove me to the hospital with an empty stomach+ exhausted after a day in her lab ( thanks akak) :(.. dont know how could i re pay her. Hope u will always be under "HIS" protection my dear.. i would like to drop my thousands thanks to yani, kema and jaja for ur kindness..huhuh..still suffering from the chicky-chicken pox... i have to stop now cause my sis is yelling to me.. (psst... she wants to use this modem. she's such a snob)huhuuu... ok.. till then.. love u guys... see you in my next entriesssss...

eclipse is coming....

To all the Twilight fans out there, the countdown for “Eclipse” had finally started. Not only that, there is also an audio interview with the Twilight star Kristen Stewart ( Bella Swan ) talking about the next installment of the Twilight Saga. If you are a big fan of the twilight saga series then you might be waiting for the eclipse.IT'S COMING...Yes, it's coming !! If u have been a good follower for this sequel then you must probably know the flow of the stories... oops. i'm not going to reveal everything here. Just wanna share with you guys some infos regarding the trailer release.. gosh, the scenes were created to increase your blood temparature..aha..:)

. I know you’re all excited!

Here are some photos of hot love scene of Edward Cullen and Bella Swan in the new Twilight sequel “Eclipse” that will be shown very very soon.

Are they hot or what?

more fun

hey guys... I found a great website which contains quizzes and it is fun.. if you have undefined things feel free to answer those quizzes

www.funquizcards.com

till then..

marriage without regrets..

Marriage Without Regrets

If you really want a marriage without regrets that lasts a lifetime, you need to prepare for marriage, starting with asking the hard before marriage questions every couple should ask and answer before getting married in order to have a happy, successful marriage without any regrets.

1. Resolving conflict in marriage
2. Understanding each partner’s role
3. Becoming financially wise
4. Respecting and keeping marriage vows

Getting married for the wrong reasons can quickly lead to an unhappy marriage ending in divorce, because couples did not prepare for marriage properly, were too young to get married or didn’t consider the fact that being married and being happily married are two entirely different things.

abusive `relationship

If you answer yes to one or more of the following “signs of an abusive relationship” quiz-questions about the boy (or girl) you are dating, then you are in danger of having a serious problem. If several of these are answered with yes, leaving an abusive relationship can mean the difference between life and death. It’s that serious. Get a new boyfriend/girlfriend, or spouse.

Is he using alcohol or drugs?

Does he have extreme mood swings? Happy one minute and angry the next?

Is he extremely jealous? Does he get angry if other boys pay attention to you or speak to you?

Does he use force during an argument? Has he ever pushed , shoved, hit or slapped you?

Does he blame others or make excuses about his problems or behaviors?

Is he verbally abusive to you? Yelling, putting you down, calling you names or threatening you?

Does he treat his mother with disrespect? Is he mean to her?

Does he try to tell you what to do, who you can or cannot see, who you can or cannot talk to?

Does he try to keep you away from your family or your friends, expecting you to spend all your time with him?

Does he criticize your family, telling you that he knows what is best for you and your family is wrong?

He doesn’t want you to tell your family or friends about the problems between the two of you.

He makes you feel guilty when you don’t want to have sex.

He pressures you into having sex with him when you don’t want to.

Physically forces you to have sex after you have said no.

Doesn’t accept or respect your decisions.

When chatting or instant messaging, he gets upset when you aren’t answering fast enough.

Implies that you lie or directly calls you a liar.

Doesn’t trust you.

Checks up on you. Tells you his friends at school are “keeping an eye on you.”

Comes to your home, school or workplace uninvited or unexpected to check up on you.

Keeps sending text messages or calling repeatedly if you don’t answer fast enough.

Hangs up the phone when he is talking to you.

Gives you the silent treatment.

Expects you to follow him and ask him what’s wrong when he walks off.

Apologizes but then does the same thing again and again.

Blames you for things he does.

Makes you feel guilty for not spending more time with him.

Tells you what you “should” do.

Tells you to do things rather than asking you to do them.

Says he can’t live with you or he will kill himself if you leave him.

Makes you feel responsible for his feelings.

Makes you afraid of telling him the truth, so you find yourself not telling him things or lying to him to avoid fights and conflicts.

Tells you what to do or not do, where to go or not go.

Telling you who to be friends with, or he doesn’t like your friends.

Telling you how to dress, how to wear your hair or make-up.

Telling you how to act, who to talk to or not talk to.

Wanting to know where you are at all times, who you are with.

Calling you to make sure you are where you said you would be.

Phoning, messaging you a lot each day.

He goes through your things; checks your phone to see who is calling or messaging you.

Starts a fight with you right before you need to leave to go home or out with your friends.

Obsessed with you; has to be a part of everything you do.

Reality check:

Remember, love doesn’t hurt. It’s not a feeling. It’s a behavior. Asking yourself these questions to find out if you’re “in love” or “in danger” can mean the difference between having a happy, healthy relationship or an abusive relationship, full of pain and misery. If your answers to these questions have caused you any sense of concern or alarm about your relationship, it’s time to turn to a family member or an adult you trust for help. Leaving an abusive relationship could save your life. Don’t be a statistic.

Tips for working moms out there..

Juggling family responsibilities, mom responsibilities and work responsibilities can get very stressful and nerve racking for the working mom. In today's technology driven society it is probably capable to stay awake and get everything done in a 24 hour period, but you do not need to stay awake for 24 hours!!

Working moms have a lot on their plates, and sometimes it's hard to figure out how to deal with it all. The following list, created by motivational speaker and trainer Joan Woods, will help the stressed out and tension filled working mom prioritize what is important and what can be actually be done without killing yourself.

o Change your response to the world - it's not the stressor but our response to it.

o Laughter is the best medicine - there's no fun in medicine but a lot of medicine in fun.

o Become productive not destructive - learn lessons from life; don't keep making the same mistakes.

o Be a 'Competent Coper' - know when perfection is not possible and adjust.

o Get rid of anger - know your stress threshold.

o Make a 'hit-list' - "so much to do in so little time" so prioritize; do what you can, now.

o Nurture your spirituality - find peace of mind, regularly.

o Stop Procrastinating! - set achievable goals. Don't fail to plan or you'll plan to fail.

o "Don't go there" - that well known phrase that, to me, means anywhere negative, critical, unsupportive, or that causes you to lose control, self-respect, or your mind!

o Slow Down - get a hobby... take a vacation, make use of the present moment

With these insights to de-stressing your life as a busy working mom, you will be able to take the tension out of your daily routine and start to focus on the things that actually matter.

be a good mother-in-law

Is there tension and conflict between you and your son- or daughter-in-law? Is your son or daughter getting married soon to someone you don’t feel is right for your child? Are you as the mother-in-law having problems getting along with your son or daughter’s spouse, so much so that you actually hate him or her? Do family gatherings and special occasions or holidays typically end in fighting, arguing and hurt feelings, followed by days or weeks of silence? Do you want to know how to be just a good mother-in-law, or would you like to know how to be the best mother-in-law, in order to avoid making mistakes that may cause permanent problems?

Some common son or daughter-in-law complaints include phrases like, “My mother-in-law hates me”, “I hate my mother-in-law” and, “I have a crazy mother-in-law from hell”. Some women refer to their mother-in-law as domineering, manipulative, overbearing, meddling and even jealous. Therefore, it’s important to ask yourself some questions regarding your attitude and behavior towards your son-in-law or daughter-in-law.

Are you over-involved? Are you too critical? Are you being judgmental, injecting your opinion into their lives too much? Are you having trouble letting go? Is your son or daughter-in-law’s religion wrong, or his/her clothes not to your liking? Are you upset about how the children are being raised, or how your son-in-law or daughter-in-law does things in the home? Be honest with yourself in how you answer these questions because it’s not a matter of intentions; it’s a matter of how your attitude and actions are perceived.

Tips on How to Be a Good Mother-In-Law

Don’t compete with your son-in-law or daughter-in-law. Don’t try and bargain for time with your son or daughter, but remember he/she want and need to spend time with their parents and friends too, so don’t expect them to spend every weekend or holiday with you. Your son/daughter has chosen and married someone from another family, with other family loyalties and traditions to attend to, merging an entirely different family dynamic with yours. This does not mean you are no longer a mom, but your duties and role as a mother have changed exponentially.

Learn to let go. Your son/daughter is an adult now and you raised him/her well, making his/her own choices and decisions as he/she should, and some of those will not be to your liking. Don’t fall victim to the mindset of thinking of your son/daughter as an eternal child, “mommy’s little boy” as it’s often referred to. Your son/daughter made an adult decision and chose this woman/man to be his/her wife/husband, someone whom he/she believes is best suited for him or her, a woman/man he or she obviously loves and adores and who he/she feels can and will care for his or her needs. Maybe, just maybe, he/she married someone just like you and that is why there is so much animosity between you and your son-in-law or daughter-in-law. He/she can’t be all bad; he or she did make a wise choice in picking your son or daughter to be her husband or wife!

Treat him/her as a friend, not like you are his/her mother. Recognize that your son or daughter-in-law is a person with their own interests, feelings, needs, beliefs, opinions, history and traditions. Don’t look for faults, criticize or call your son or daughter-in-law nasty names. Don’t make snide remarks to your son about his wife and vice-versa, as this will only cause hurt feelings, and drive a wedge between you and your son and his wife or your daughter and her husband. You are no longer responsible for your son/daughter in the same way that you once were. Your son/daughter has taken on new responsibility; your son or daughter-in-law and any grandchildren that may bless their union, and you must respect that.

Treat your in-law as an adult who just happens to be married to your son or daughter. Your son/daughter chose him/her to be his wife or her husband, and you must accept that and respect his or her wishes. “A man will leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife”, so you must remember that you are a guest in their marriage and in their home. You need to cultivate a loyalty to this new union by holding it in honor and respect, not undermine their relationship. Understand that as man and wife, your son and daughter-in-law need to set and maintain appropriate boundaries for their marital relationship.

They need to discover for themselves how to get along with the in-laws, and it may take them a little time to determine the right boundaries for them. Do not get pulled into arguments between your son and daughter-in-law. Be supportive and take a step back, respectfully allowing the couple to handle and deal with their own problems. Have trust and faith that you raised your son/daughter with the courage and ability to resolve any conflicts that arise in their marriage.

Explore your motives. Do you feel and act critical toward your son or daughter-in-law, wishing he/she were different in some way? Think about the reasons why you feel the need to judge and if you would want to be judged in the same way you are judging your daughter-in-law. Be willing to let your son or daughter-in-law make some mistakes. Let your daughter-in-law grow as a mother and as a wife. You didn’t start off being a perfect wife and mother, so don’t expect her to be perfect from the start either. Don’t presume to be all-knowing in regards to marriage and parenting. Showing respect and restraint is a gift to your son and daughter-in-law, as well as to your grandchildren.

Do not be a gossip. Do not, under any circumstances, gossip with family members, friends or acquaintances about your son or daughter-in-law. Anything you say will eventually get back to her and your son, and will inevitably create a situation where your son will start to feel less close to you and may decide to spend even less time with you than he has in the past. Not only will you be driving a wedge between family members and friends but, those you gossip to will lose trust and respect for you because of your negative gossip and criticism, causing friends and family to wonder what you may be saying about them behind their back.

Honesty and good communication. Develop good communication and reasonable expectations regarding the role you will play in your son or daughter-in-law’s lives. Questions you might consider asking your son or daughter-in-law include: How would you like me to help, and how will I know when you want my help? How will you let me know if I overstep any boundaries? What role would you like me to play in caring for the grandchildren in regards to feeding or discipline? What house rules have you set for the grandchildren so I am sure to abide by them? Be honest but not cruel in how you speak to or about your son or daughter-in-law, talking to and treating him/her as you would want to be spoken to and treated yourself.

Forgive and forget. You will from time to time say and do things that are perceived as wrong, and so will your son or daughter-in-law. At times you may not even be aware of what you did or said that was wrong. While your intention may be to be helpful and show you care, the effect it has on your son or daughter-in-law may be taken quite differently than you may have intended. Be forgiving and patient for any offenses or hurt feelings, so you can try to move forward in your efforts to build a better relationship with your son or daughter-in-law.

For the mother-in-law who absolutely refuses to make amends or won’t even try to get along with her daughter-in-law, author Camille Russo shares this reminder in her book, How to Be a Perfect Mother-In-Law, “Your daughter-in-law may have the final say on which nursing home you’ll be sent to!” There are many great books on being a good mother-in-law to help mother-in-law’s improve their relationship with their son-in-law or daughter-in-law, so don’t miss the opportunity to take the initiative.